Lazy Sunday!

After completing a packed Saturday that started at 5am.. and ended sometime in the wee hours on Sunday morning, I decided to reward myself with a lazy Sunday afternoon of watching Football... Sure its a luxury I may not have for long, so I figured I'd squeeze it in while I could... After all, the Chargers are looking good, the Patriots lost.. and I kept flipping over to watch the Yankees-Sox game go into extra innings...

But unfortunately my lazy Sunday didn't end up lasting long, since later in the evening I had to attend to a few other things, including writing and researching a paper... finally, after getting that done, I allowed myself to flip the channels and caught the "top 100 songs" from the past decade..

As the songs played in the background, while I continued hacking away at my keyboard, I kept thinking back to the times of each song. Its funny how every single #1 reminded me of an exciting summer in high school.. or a Halloween party .. really just bringing back memories associated with that time in my life..

Got me thinking.. You always tend to look into the past and reminisce about the good times you had.

Also, reminded me of the excitement I felt back then at the prospect of school, college, traveling abroad, or whatever have you.

and then i started wondering about the things that I might have done different, and how that might have changed the life I currently live.

What if I took a job in Canada, and never made it down to the states?
How about taking on that internship in Finland, and maybe settling in Scandinavia?

What if I'd gone to that Oktoberfest event in Germany, that all my friends went to?

Perhaps that wedding of my friend that I wanted to attend and never could?

You're always going to have thoughts about the past that make you feel good or not so great.
You always tend to ponder the future with feelings of excitement and anxiety intertwined.

Could I have done anything different?
Should I have done anything different?

I remember when I wanted to apply to college.. I made sure I did everything to position myself the best possible way for the interview..met the right people, said the right things.. even made an unsolicited visit to press my case.. even before I got the decision.

Was I more aggressive back then? Has age and.. ahem maturity.. made me softer?

I wanted to explore retail sales after college.. and I cold called' the crap out of the companies I wanted...even showed up to meet the GM of a dealership hours after I had faxed him my resume. I waited in the lobby until he gave me 10 minutes...and boy did I make those minutes count!

They wanted somebody.. I had to prove I was that somebody.

That's really what it all comes down to!

A house for sale wants somebody to be a buyer... You need to convince the seller you're that somebody.
A company with an opening wants an employee... You need to convince them you're that somebody.

Everything comes down to that.. filling that void.. filling that need..

SOMEBODY's gotta get it...why not that somebody be you?

But that's the thing... There IS a need. when you have that, you have a shot.

What about cases when there is no "need".. or "void".
There is no position to fill?

Or what if you want something.. but its just not available?
that's just bad timing..

Timing.. the most critical of things.. sometimes way beyond anything you can control.

if you want a job now.. and your dream company isn't hiring till next year.. what can you do?

What about those times you lowered your bet to the minimum, only to get a blackjack?
Remember when you bought a new stock? and the market tanked?
and then you sold at a loss.. and then the stock just exploded?
how about that timing..

You can walk away.. brush it off..
it just wasn't mean to be..

but what if it was something you really wanted?
It could be a stock,
it could be that house. .
it could be your career.
it could be "her"..

Well it could be a "him".. lets not forget.. Dont Ask Don't Tell did just get repealed!

So you walk away...?
nothing you coulda done?
give up.. go home?
It just "wasn't in the cards"?

I remember my best poker hand that I played..
I got a 2 pair on the flop... Winning hand that..
and then the turn brought about a pair on the board..
Somebody might have trips!
and then the Ace rivered.
What should I have done?
Smart strategy would be to fold..
I wasn't that invested..
but i looked around.. .I didn't see a lot of confidence...
and so I represented the full house..
and I played it like a full-house..
and then people started mucking..
and at the river...I bet strong.. and a guy with a higher 2 pair actually folded!
I won that hand..
the one that "wasn't in the cards"

and I don't even care about poker.. but i went for it.

Would I do that for something I really cared about?
What if the timing wasn't right?
Would I be willing to just walk away?

When it really matters.. what are you willing to do?
You can't fit a square peg in a round hole..
That is futile.. and also stupid.
If its a bad deal.. you walk away...
There's always another opportunity if you look hard enough..

But if it could fit..but the timing's off..
do you still let the situation get the better of you?

In some matters, you just can't force the issue..
So what do you do?

They say your legacy is defined by the decisions you make..
but it is equally impacted... by those you didn't make!

Everyone knows about "The Decision" courtesy Lebron.
He probably made the wrong one..
even if it was the correct one, he went about it the wrong way.
He was listening to the wrong people..

When faced with the "big" decisions...
you talk to those you care about
and sound out your thoughts..
and hear theirs..
Its probably why people have partners.
in firms..
in investments..
in relationships..

Unless of course that's the very decision you're faced with..
haha.. that's when you gotta listen to your gut..
and make your decision flying solo..

and as I type this... the "hit" being played on tv?

"My shadow's the only one that walks beside me..
...I walk alone"

Appropriate!

-The Canuck "Greenday" Engineer